Unexamined Privilege
What do you take for granted?
When I walk down the street, guys don't ask me to smile. Random strangers don't fling compliments my way like alms for beggars. I don't have to go out of my way to look like I don't want to be bothered. I'm physically and mentally healthy, able, doing work that I love. I'm also a cis-gendered, straight male. These are things I take for granted. And for a lot of people like me, that doesn't feel like privilege.
Examining your privilege
I don't claim to be an expert on racism, sexism, or any of the myriad other forms of oppression in society. I'm not here to educate, either, since there is much I have to learn myself. What I can do is share what examining privilege looks like for me. In doing so, I hope others can see that it is not only possible, but necessary.
Recognizing oppression
It's easy to know when we are not in a position of power. It is much harder, and way more important to realize when we are. For me, an example would be being in a room with mostly men. Or when I am among the majority who speak English, and a few non-native English speakers are present. Or I'm at a venue that isn't handicap accessible. See a pattern here? It's when I'm most comfortable that I need to look for who I'm marginalizing.
Embrace vulnerability
If you're like me, you don't like thinking about this stuff. Why should I leave my position of comfort to accommodate someone who clearly doesn't belong? Why can't they work on being like everyone else? Other reactions include defensiveness: I don't want to deal with the guilt of something my ancestors did! I'm not like the others in my dominant peer group, I have marginalized friends! If this echoes some of your thoughts, congratulations. You are on your way to noticing your privilege.
Now recognize it as such. Embrace being vulnerable, being open to acknowledging that those without that same privilege still need a voice, a chair at the table.
It's ok not to have answers
There are no easy answers here. I can't pretend discrimination doesn't happen by saying "I don't see color, gender, etc.". I can't commiserate by saying, "Oh, that happened to me", because no, it didn't. Someone with privilege, by definition, cannot experience discrimination. You can't ideate your way to someone's lived experience.
What then? Empathy, always empathy. Know that there is anger, distrust, fear, and deep sadness in being marginalized. Know that it is constant, an inescapable cross to bear, all the time. You can set aside your caremad, they can't.
Here are some other things you can do: * Invite the marginalized to contribute. Make it safe for them to do so. * Call people out on their privilege. Be OK with getting called out on yours. * Be willing to learn, without having to be taught. * Listen without agenda. Question your responses.
Hold me accountable
This post is not only an attempt to help people see their privilege, but also a call to marginalized people to hold me and my peers accountable. Call me out! If there's anything in here that's offensive, I'd love to hear about it. This blog is open sourced, so pull requests are welcome. I can be reached privately via DM or email. In the interest of maintaining a safe environment, I will be moderating comments. Looking forward to your feedback.